So much to say so much to say so much to say so much to say

little babay.

Remember when hating on Dave Matthews Band was the thing to do?

Remember before that when Dave Matthews Band was like the gateway drug to Phish and also to actual drugs?

And before that when you thought Under the Table and Dreaming was cut from the same cloth as your very own soul?

And how you spent a lot of time trying to teach your fingers to play "Satellite" on your guitar that has since died/been sold/been stolen by gypsies/been placed in permanent storage/been stepped on?

Okay, enough reminiscing.

But speaking of little babays, for item #1: mine is a whole year old now!

I think it was a few days after he turned one that he really started to SEEM one to me. Mainly because of his increased interest in what his sister is doing. And even though he's not a big talker yet, the way he gestures and babbles make it seem like at least HE knows what he is saying now. Also he's starting to get these little wisps of longish hair. Oh. so. cute.

I love him a lot. Yeah, no duh.

Item #2: I keep thinking that maybe I need to review all these children's books we get from the library. There are some really fantastic children's books out there with some mind-bogglingly awesome illustrations. And some of them even have very cool concepts and inventive language. I have also had great fun introducing my daughter to children's poetry of late.

I wish I could go back and look at all the books we have checked out in the last two years or so. In the meantime, maybe I can just remember and list some of the stand-outs that big sis really loved:

The Runaway Bunny
Jump!
Snip Snap!: What's That?
Fortunately
We're Going on a Bear Hunt
One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish
A Sick Day for Amos McGee
The Lion and the Mouse
Tough Chicks

We also own a lot of books that she loves too, but I'm just not feeling a marathon post as much as I thought I was.

Item #3 is where I run out of steam altogether. But I do want to give a shout out, because I have read a lot of parenting books and this one is MAYBE my favorite so far (although there are a couple of infant care ones that were really handy during the first go-round): Screamfree Parenting.

I hesitated to read this one because it seems kind of faddish. There's apparently a heckuva lot of marketing and branding associated with this book (like I could probably buy a couple online courses, a t-shirt, five other books with similar titles, etc.) and all the tie-ins made me a wee bit suspicious and skeptical. For now, though, I think it's like Jillian Michaels legit. You know, it's for real as long as you actually do something about it.

It's too early and maybe overstating things a bit to say it changed my life but it really has altered my perspective. It doesn't hurt that it was short and easy to read. The main idea is pretty simple: focus on the thing you can control -- yourself. Also, you are not responsible FOR your child (as in every behavior and choice made by the child does not automatically reflect on the parent) but you are responsible TO your child (to SHOW them how to behave and make choices). Though simple, I have found this idea to be very important and even more important the somewhat counter-intuitive idea of focusing on myself when disciplining my child (i.e., instead of considering what will get her to behave or change I consider how I can best 1) restrain myself from getting heated and 2) give the most appropriate and natural consequence for the behavior). It's going to take a lot of practice but I think I am slowly moving toward the parent I want to be, which is of course Claire Huxtable.